The Love Life Blog: real advice for real people. 


The Sexual Glutton vs The Sexual Gourmet

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, May 29, 2016

I was chatting to a good friend recently who, like many people, loves sex and loves the general topic of sex. He was musing on whether he might possibly be a sex addict given that he’s so fascinated, possibly even obsessed, by the topic. My reply was: “I hope not, because that would make me one too!”

It got me thinking, because I have done on-line “Are you a Sex Addict’ type quizzes, and according to some of them I certainly would be a sex addict because thinking about sex takes up so much of my time and sex in general plays such a big part of my life.  read more...



The Picnic Approach to Sex

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, May 14, 2016




The standard approach to sex is rather like a three course meal, it proceeds in set stages: you kiss a bit, fondle a bit (maybe give her an orgasm), then have vigorous intercourse until he comes. The End.

It’s not a bad model for sex, but it’s limited, and can get pretty boring over time.

I suggest you approach sex more like a picnic, with everything available at once and you pick and choose whatever you want in whatever quantity and in whatever order you please.  read more...



Practice Expressing Your Feelings For Greater Connection and Better Sex

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, April 29, 2016



A key to intimacy is expressing your feelings. Not your thoughts, your feelings: being able to share with your partner how you are feeling and being able to hear what he or she is sharing with you.

It's not an easy thing to do. More commonly people hold back out of fear of a negative reaction from their partner. So they end up playing this weird dance of trying to mind-read what the other wants and feels, and generally getting it wrong.
 read more...



Let’s Talk About Our Sex

Jacqueline Hellyer - Saturday, April 16, 2016



I was chatting with an attractive woman in her mid-40s at a party recently. She’d told me that after a brief disastrous marriage she hadn’t been able to successfully ‘do’ the relationship thing, as she put it, so she was fascinated to hear about my work and life.

After a while she got a puzzled look on her face and asked hesitantly: “Do you two talk about your sex life?”

“Why, yes, of course we do,” I replied. read more...



Love Your Breasts

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, April 08, 2016



Soft, rounded curves of femininity: breasts are the archetypal symbol of womanliness.

It’s probably the reason we women have so much trouble with them! They’re too small or too big, too saggy or the nipples are funny… We don’t pay them a lot of attention, and when we do, it’s generally negative thoughts.

In the Tantric tradition though, a woman’s breasts are her positive pole, and it’s essential that we focus positively on our positive pole (and that our partners do too). read more...



Ditch the Sex Myths

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, April 01, 2016



If you want to become a great lover and have wonderful sex, you have to ditch the myths that plague us.

Our society is full of sex myths. Because we don’t talk openly about the details of our sex lives and there have been so many moral issues associated with sex for so long that so many beliefs are taken for truth. These beliefs are so entrenched they can be challenging to let go of, but until you do, you’re holding yourself back. If you buy into a belief that there’s something wrong or bad about being a certain way, you’ll inevitably be judgmental about yourself and others.

Judgment is the biggest impediment to growth in any area, including sexuality.

I’m going to challenge you by starting with three big myths that are very entrenched in our society: read more...



Relax Into Orgasm

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, March 18, 2016



Relax your hips,

relax your buttocks,

relax your abdomen,

breathe read more...



When A Woman Is Free To Be Herself Sex Takes On A Spiritual Dimension

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, March 04, 2016



When a woman gets to a level of arousal where she’s in a different ‘zone’ - love-drunk, in a heightened state, an altered state of consciousness - the sex changes.

There’s a different energy in that state, strange things happen. You can become aware of different sensations in your body: feelings of ecstasy and rapture, of transport and transcendence.

The description of this state sounds almost religious. read more...



It All Starts With a Kiss…

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, February 19, 2016



Lips part, faces draw near, lips touch. 

Close your eyes and imagine this, feel it, fully present in your lips, in your tongue. 

Your lips are soft, testing, sensing. Your mouth is relaxed, your tongue gentle. read more...



The Ecstasy is in the Spaces In-Between

Jacqueline Hellyer - Friday, February 05, 2016



Intense sex can be wonderful, transporting you on a wave of fervour, even ferocity. You’ll find the pleasure of passion there, but if you want ecstasy, rapture, you have to look elsewhere…

Because the ecstasy is found in the spaces in-between…

Imagine…just the barest of touches…not quite a touch at all…just the knowledge of the presence of the other… read more...



1 .. 2 3 4 5 6 .. 28

FREE LOVE

Subscribe
to my LOVELIFE blog for weekly inspiration on sex, love and intimacy!



Podcast



Search

Tags

Recent Posts

 

Earlier Posts



For more great sex advice -
read my books!