Don’t think of sex as having Key Performance Indicators. Sex isn’t about performance, it’s about pleasure! So, let’s talk about our Key Pleasure Indicators.
Good sex comes from the appreciation of the experience not the performance of ‘correct’ acts. It’s about the feeling. So, you’re not looking at quantitative KPIs – how often, how long, how many orgasms etc. You’re looking at qualitative KPIs. These might include:
Does it feel good
Does it feel mutual
Does it feel connected
Do you feel present
Do you feel embodied
Do you feel free to express yourself
Are you paying attention to each other
Are you savouring the experience
Does it make you feel better for having done it
Does it increase joy, contentment, happiness, satisfaction in life
These are quite broad and I’m sure you have a lot more specific ones that relate to your own individual sexuality. So, I invite you to think about your own KPIs, and if you have a partner to discuss them together, lightly and creatively, and get clear on your mutual Key Pleasure Indicators. Then set about achieving them!
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