The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!


Trust Means Being OK with Not Knowing

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, February 05, 2013

"How can I ever trust him/her again?” 

Client after client pleads this after discovering hurtful deceits by their beloveds. 
What they are really asking is: "How can I ever be 100% sure that my partner won't ever do this again?"



The honest answer is: you can't. In fact, you never could.

You can never be absolutely sure that your partner will never ever be deceitful or hurt you in some way. 


The very definition of ‘trust’ is ‘not knowing’.  read more...



Intercourse as Foreplay

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Foreplay is generally seen as what you do before you get to intercourse, to prepare yourselves (especially the woman) to be ready to receive “penetration” by the man. Intercourse is seen as a vigorous activity consisting of the man thrusting into the woman, or less frequently, the woman bouncing around on the man.

 read more...



The Pleasure of A Soft Cock

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, December 13, 2011

There is so much pressure on penises. The poor things are supposed to rise to attention on command, stay hard for hours, only ejaculate when desired - and if they can’t do that, then the sex is considered poor. 

 What’s wrong with a soft cock?

 Nothing, and there’s plenty of pleasure to be had with one:
 read more...



The Breadth of Sexuality & The Importance of Fun

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, August 31, 2010

I often find that people are surprised at the breadth of sexuality I encourage. As with so much of our society, we tend to categorize and label others and ourselves. What I do can’t be labeled in this way. I’m not just ‘tantric’ or ‘kinky’ or ‘raunchy’ or ‘clinical’ or whatever – I’m all of them, and more.

I believe in the full range of sexual expression, as long as it comes from a place that is real.

For me that’s the only issue. Are you being real, and are you allowing expression of your true self? I don’t believe there is any right or wrong when it comes to sex, as long as it’s between consenting living adult humans, as long as it’s life enhancing.

So the tantric types get a shock in my workshops when I bring out the bondage ropes; those who embrace raunch culture find the softness disconcerting; the kinky types wonder if all this talk about love isn’t a bit vanilla; and the clinical types find the fun and naughtiness rather perplexing.

But it’s all good! Tantric bondage, soft raunch, loving kink, are all real expressions of possibility.
 read more...



The Great G-Spot & Female Ejaculation Debate!

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Firstly, let me apologise on behalf of my profession that, in the early 21st century, we still don’t know how women’s bodies work! I find it appalling that there’s still debate over what’s in our vaginas and what effect touching various parts produces! read more...



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