The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!

#122: Ten Reasons Why Married Women Have Affairs, and What To Do When She Does

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, February 24, 2015

A large proportion of the clients I see are dealing with affairs, and the majority of those are married women who have had an affair, are having an affair, are on the brink of succumbing to an affair or are flirting with the idea of having an affair. read more...

#119: 10 Tips For Your Vagina

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, January 27, 2015

A friend asked me recently what my Top Ten Tips for a vagina would be. “Good question!” I thought. So many women feel disconnected from their genitals, and don’t have a good feeling about them. We don’t even have a decent word for them, often using the word “vagina” to apply to the whole genital area. So here I use the word “vagina” to apply to just the vagina, and as to the whole of the genitals? Well, read on! read more...

#110: Luscious Woman Online Course Released

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Would you like to feel really good about your sexuality?


I believe women have extraordinary sexual potential, which after so many centuries of suppression and the the last few decades of confusion, means that many women have no idea of their potential or how to reach it. And if women are missing out then sure as hell their partners are too!  read more...

#106: Meet the Seven Sex Goddesses in my new book of educational erotica!

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, September 09, 2014

Meet the Seven Sex Goddesses and discover how they can help you truly embody your sexuality and express yourself fully as a woman!

The Goddesses represent fundamental psychic energies that you as a modern woman can draw on to awaken your sexual potential.

You’ll meet the Lady, the Amazon, the Bawd, the Madonna, the Seductress, the Maestra and the Earth Gypsy - and come to feel the different female sexual expressions they represent.

By drawing on their energetic expression, you can become more sexually confident and expressive and have more sexual desire and greater sexual response!

#97: Make Love to Yourself - Mindful Masturbation for Women

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, May 13, 2014


Making love to yourself is a wonderful experience. It gets you in touch with your body, more confident in your sexuality, it makes you more orgasmic, floods your body with happy hormones, and generally makes you happier and healthier!

I call it self-pleasuring, which is a far more appealing and indulgent term than the clinical, and somehow ‘wrong’ sounding term of ‘masturbation’.

Solo sex is different to partnered sex. It’s not worse than partnered sex, or less than partnered sex - what you do when you can’t get the ‘real thing’ - it’s just different  read more...

#93: Q&A: Why Doesn’t Porn Do It for Me?

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, March 04, 2014

I’m often asked questions like this one I received through Women’s Health Magazine:

My boyfriend wants to watch porn with me, and I have nothing against porn, but I haven't found any that turns me on – the women tend to be all fake-tanned and fake-nailed, and the sex is so staged. Can you make any recommendations on porn that appeals to both men and women?

And my response to enquiries like this tends to be along the lines of: read more...

#85: Advice from Japanese Grandmothers on How to Be Beautiful

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, November 12, 2013

I’m not sure where I found this, but it’s wonderful advice. It’s pretty much the approach I’ve always followed, and I look pretty good for my age! read more...

#78: Obligation Sex is Self-Imposed Low-Level Sexual Trauma

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, July 23, 2013

There is a school of thought that says women should ‘just do it’. The implication being that sex really isn’t that important, it’s easy to lie there and get it over with - I guess the idea is that you can just plan the shopping list or something while he gets his necessary sexual release (as if he doesn’t have two hands available).

I find that approach abhorrent on so many levels. Most obviously, men don’t actually want obligation sex. Radical concept to some perhaps, but men actually want their partners to enjoy sex too. (Hmm, maybe men aren’t just animalist creatures wanting to get their end in?)

Less obviously, but more importantly: sex is not just sex. The vagina is exquisitely linked to a woman’s brain, her self-worth, her creativity, her joie de vivre. For her to feel good about herself and about life she needs to treat her vagina well.

A vagina that engages in gorgeous, desirable, satisfying love-making will make her owner feel wonderful. A vagina that engages in unwanted, unprepared sex (slapping on some lube is not preparation) will not make her owner feel good. The vagina is being subjected to low-level trauma and so the woman is being subjected to low-level trauma. She will feel resentful, irritated, frustrated, used (sound familiar?). When a woman feels like this it goes inward, so she feels bad about herself and life in general; all because she’s ‘just doing it’ and putting out because for some reason she thinks she ‘should’.

Say ‘no’ to obligation sex and say ‘yes’ to desired sex, sex that is good for your vagina and good for you!


#56: Pelvic Floor Pleasures - The Basics

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Can you use your pelvic floor to draw up energy and recharge yourself?
Can you have sustained orgasms?
Men, can you use your muscles to help you last longer? 
If not, can I suggest you strengthen your pelvic floor muscles? read more...

#55: Pelvic Floor Pleasures - Advanced

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Once you've been practicing the basic exercises for a while, you should feel a change in your pelvis, feeling more present and connected to your genital region. This is a good thing.
Give your pelvic floor a squeeze now, notice how it connects you to your pelvic area. Breath into your belly and do some more squeezes, nice and relaxed.

Let’s look at some advanced pleasures;

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