The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!
So many people consume sex like other goods. Like good little capitalists they crave and crave, wanting more and more: bigger, harder, faster, more diversity, more people, more orgasms, more toys, more excitement, more, more, more…
Popular culture encourages this with porn’s approach to creating craving for more and more.
Even in alternative, spiritual sexuality there’s often still this craving – for the cosmic orgasm, the kundalini rush, the bliss beyond.
Give us the tip, what’s the technique, show us the method… All wanting the bigger and better, the more.
And it doesn’t lead anywhere. Other than an endless desperate yearning for some level of satisfaction that can never be reached.
It’s a hedonistic treadmill. As one male client who’d been on the treadmill for years, thinking he was cool and sexually open, said: “where was it all going to end – with a cock in each orifice and a zucchini up my nose?!” What an absurd situation!
As that client came to realise, sexual satisfaction doesn’t come from constantly chasing sensation on the outside. It comes from savouring sensation from within, exploring the subtle, the slow, the simple. And while that can of course include any activity or prop that takes your fancy, those elements are there to enhance an experience, not to chase a result.
Slow the fuck down! Literally.
Get off the hedonistic treadmill. Savour what you are experiencing in the moment.
And paradoxically, that will lead to better sexual response, orgasm, kundalini flow and bliss…
- #340: What Comes Before Consent
- #339: More than Sex-Positive, We Need to be Sex-Comfortable
- #338: Get Off the Hedonistic Treadmill!
- #337: You Can't Search for Love. It's Already There. You Can Only Remove the Barriers to Let It In
- #336: How to Communicate Complaints Effectively
- #335: Nurture Your Soul with Sex
- #334: How to Express Your Emotions Without Being "Emotional"
- #333: Q&A: We're Time Poor - How Do We Add Some Zing?
- #332: Be Conscious Not Complacent
- #331: It's OK to Disappoint Your Partner
- #330: Moans & Groans – why sound is good in sex and how to make more
- #329: Gateways to the Erotic Shift
- #328: Safety is Sexy
- #327: Pace Your Sexual Interactions
- #326: Fly on the Wall Friday - my new Video Series
to LOVELIFE News for regular inspiration on sex, love and intimacy!