The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!

#125: Honour Your Genitals for Exquisite Sex - the Why and How

Jacqueline Hellyer - Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Honouring our genitals is a key part of Tantra and conscious love-making, and essential to great sex.

To honour means to regard something with great respect. That’s not going to happen if you have a shame-based sexuality where the genitals are regarded as somehow ‘dirty’ and unattractive, to be hidden away; or if you have a lewd ‘tits and bums’ approach to sexuality where it’s nothing but the genitals - huge hard cocks and dripping wet pussies (not to imply there’s anything wrong with hard cocks or wet pussies, only if they are the sole focus).

To truly honour the genitals, your partner’s and your own, is to love them, admire them and attend to them.

Let’s look at these three aspects of honouring:

Love Your Genitals

Your genitals are a really important part of your body. Not only are they the generators of life, which makes them sacred for that reason alone, they are vehicles for glorious pleasure and connection. You’ve got to love your genitals and your partner’s genitals, really love them, as much as any part of a person’s body, mind and soul.

Admire Your Genitals

Take your time to get to know your own and your partner’s genitals. Get up close and personal, take a good look and get to know them like the back of your hand, Get curious and find out what they like and how, become an expert in your partner’s and your own genitalia.

Attend to Your Genitals

Spend focused quality time on your genitals - slowly, with presence and attention. Too often genitals are only treated with intensity and speed, which means we miss out on the subtle and the range of sensation that accompanies a slow gentle focus. Vigour and intensity can be good too, but first wake up your genitals with softness, bringing awareness and mindfulness to the encounter.

This all applies as much to your own genitals as your partner’s: love, admiration and attention.

Develop this level of honour and respect and you’ll feel better about yourself, feel closer to your partner and, of course, have much better sex.


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